Musings on why we are our ultimate travel destination
I am not a scientist or would even attest to having a predisposition to the science and math fields. Basic biology still stumps me yet I have enough knowledge to understand my physical body, what it needs and how it operates. I appreciate and value it as without it I simply would not exist. I don’t need to know the finer inner workings in order to appreciate it.
I am not an astrophysics either yet that doesn’t stop me from being in awe of the Universe. I marvel at the beauty of the planet, respect her and understand my place within it. How easy it is as humans to think we are the ones in control. Foolish and contrite. We are so miniscule on the universal scale. We are like ants within the greater scheme of life. This life just one within the universal flows. How grandiose that we think we the most singular important factor. In a world engulfed with the taking of selfies and self focus catapulted by the wave of social media we are loosing ourselves. So busy are we worrying about how we look that we don’t actually stop and look at where we are. So busy living life through a mobile phone lens we become detached from the actual experience. We become a 3rd party to the fact. Too focused on capturing a moment instead of living it.
But I digress.
I am comfortable in an experience without needing to understand it.
I take delight in feeling the sand between my toes and navigating the crashes of the waves as I walk along the beach.
I am in awe of the sun setting and the splashes of light that cover the sky.
I feel the embrace of the moon in the darkest of night skies.
There is a connectedness that transcend time.
I feel it all yet I don’t need to understand it mentally.
Some things you just know. It’s a knowing deep within. Its not a head thing. In fact, the head can get it in the way.
Yet in a world that prizes the intellect and seeks answers and absolutes and validation its challenging to simply be with what is, to take comfort in your own knowing and to live a life following the inner guidance.
In an environment where something must be proved to be right or real or true, we are loosing the magic. The magic of embracing our uniqueness and the courage to bring that forth.
We are conditioned to be part of a pack.
Squashing our creativity, our life force and struggling against the increasing tides of uniformity.
I am not sure where all this is coming from or where its going. I was going to write on transgenerational trauma but it seems we are down another path. Go with it. Allow. Surrender.
I feel as an infant, even as far back as in-utero I was aware that I was connected to something far greater then this tiny little physical body. It was such a huge shock to experience the world I was born into. I became aware of feeling vulnerable, scared and at the mercy of those whom were my family. I wanted to scream. I wanted to run. I wanted to go back. Back to the love. I was trapped. I was pissed off and at the hands of other. My spark of light began to dim. The ideology of coming forth and being a way shower of love and connectedness on this planet became erased.
At key points through my infancy I remember purely out of the need for physical survival, to dim my light. To surrender to them. The pain that endured from me attempting to speak and express who I was, was too much for my body. The risk was too high. I did what I had to do. I became what they wanted and needed me to be. So they were happy so that they could give me the love they were capable of providing. I morphed into their rendition of a good girl. I became subservient, amiable. Every single choice in becoming this suffocated myself further. Deeper and deeper out of sight out of reach ‘I’ disappeared. Until that spark of unique light went out. Disconnection had occurred. Numbness many say is the absence of feeling. Trust me numb is a feeling. It effects your nervous system, your mental acumen, your ability to relate with other authentically and it colours your world into many shades of grey.
I was numb and remained that way until life events occurred that shook me from my slumber.
Disorienting. To be woken from a slumber you have lived in for over 30 years.
Some never wake up.
Some, like myself do.
There is work to be done. Our lights must shine once more. We must address the pain hidden beneath the numb. Healing needs to occur. Realignment needs to commence. Reconnection to our true essence, to that spark of light and love of which we are.
Unbecoming all that we thought we were.
Its not blissy. But the rewards are plentiful.
Correct identification that we are more then the human physical body. We have a body but we are not our body. Within is our spark, our eternal essence, spirit. A powerfully loving life force that propels us ever forward. The light that never dies. As water is a source of life to our body, spirit is the eternal source. Seeking to experience all of life expressions. In various places and time.
Residing deep within us, in our core, our centre ‘she’ lies. Always present. Patiently waiting. Welcoming communion. Navigating. Championing.
In the quiet you will hear. Through the stillness you will feel. In the depths of your existence you will know.
Its reaching that still point within after years of covering it up that the task at hand.
Its unhooking yourself from patterns that no longer serve.
Reviewing beliefs, should’s, ought’s and ought not’s to see if they are a true reflection of your own know.
Its having the courage to review you in your life. What resonates now? What doesn’t?
Its listening to the voices in your head – who do you hear? What are they saying?
Its clearing out the emotional baggage.
Its prioritizing self care.
Its becoming selfless, centered in self, not self-centered.
Its reorienting your life expression to one fuelled through wonder, curiosity.
It’s embracing your past and not running from it.
It’s owning your story yet no longer being defined by it
It’s healing the wounds and transforming them into love.
It’s courageously every day keeping your flame alive.
It’s feeding your life source.
It’s being a way shower and the best version of yourself possible.
It’s about never forgetting who you truly are.
It’s leaving leaving a trail of love on this Planet, of which we came.
It’s connection to self, to land and Planet.
Written by Libby Kinna 2019